Brace yourself kids, ish is about to get real!
As I’m sure most of you have noticed, I chopped off all of my natural hair. Any other time, this wouldn’t be a big deal, as I’m always cutting my hair after I get bored with it, but this was a bit different. After cutting it, I got the usual remarks:
“Omg, why’d you cut all of your hair off?”
“Omg I can’t believe you cut it! Whyyy? I loved your hair.”
or my favorite,
“But it was so pretty and so long!”
Thanks guys. I’m sure it’s so short and so ugly now–appreciate all of your love and support.
In most instances, I don’t care what people think about me or my hair because frankly, it’s nobody else’s business. If I wanted to go bald it shouldn’t mean a dang thing to anybody else or their mama! But this time, the haircut meant something. It was difficult for me to cut it because I knew that if I did, when I did, I would have to make it worth while. If not, what would have been the point? Here’s what I sent to my mom and sisters in a group text, you know, just to avoid any unwanted commentary whilst already in a vulnerable state:
“…I’m on a journey and I had to do something for myself. Over the past 5 years I’ve gained 70lbs. I fluctuate between 214 and 220 right now. I didn’t feel pretty anymore. My face is round, I know. I don’t need any reminders. I was eating out way to much, spending tons of money and shopping unnecessarily. I’ve been being lazy and not going after my dreams. So I cut my hair. I cut my hair because it’s a part of my journey to change. Mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically…So, not that it matters or I owe anybody an explanation, but there ya go.”
In late October of 2014, I began my journey–one that required I start anew. These past couple of years have been interesting for me. I gained tons of weight, dropped out of graduate school twice, voluntarily moved back in with my parents and am currently using my hard-earned degree to simply work in retail–something had to change. Don’t get me wrong, retail is cool, but that is not what I had planned for my life; and although I get a kick out of it most days, it will soon grow into a place of misery. I went from living life in NYC, to settling back down in rural, South Louisiana. As I’m sure you can imagine, internally I was losing my shxt! So, I made a decision: I am going to do what I love to do and not settle for anything less than that! I am not only going to learn to love myself for who and what I am, but grow into an even better version of that and continue to love her just as much! & as my hair grows back and changes over the years, I intend to grow and change with it.
So, to any and everyone who asked or was wondering, that’s why I cut my hair–not that it’s any of your concern, my dear.
Remember, grow to love and appreciate yourself because “you see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.” -Mother Teresa
Are any of you going through a transitional phase in your lives? Have any of you struggled with or been successful in weight loss? If so, please feel free to comment below and share your stories, tips and words of encouragement!